Scheer promises to add milk chugging challenge to Canadian food guide - 2019-07-24
OTTAWA – At a press conference held earlier today, Leader of the Conservative Party, Andrew Scheer, promoted the inclusion of consuming several litres of whole milk in less than an hour into the Canadian food guide.
"There is lots of evidence to suggest that starting your day with 3.78 litres of whole milk can give you the energy and hydration needed, until your mid-morning bucket of sour cream," proclaimed the potential Prime Minister, as he shovelled handfuls of plain Greek yogurt into his mouth.
Reacting to the news, a spokesperson for the Dairy Farmers of Canada stated, "We couldn't be happier about this proposal. I'm not a doctor but there are dozens of studies that our organization has paid millions of dollars for clearly illustrating that milk is extremely healthy and probably cures erectile dysfunction."