Scientology, Winning! We Hear from the Church's 1 Student - 2012-01-12
On Thursdays, Scientology's staff members race to get their statistics turned in by 2 pm, the end of their week. Here at the Voice, we do the same thing, rounding up the world's media on Scientology each Thursday and deciding whether the church has had an "upstat" or "downstat" week. (Go here for our primer, "What is Scientology?")
We're going to do something different this time, however. The first two weeks of 2012 have been disastrous for Scientology, what with former high-ranking official Debbie Cook e-mailing thousands of her fellow church members in what amounts to a call of rebellion that will further rip apart an organization splitting at the seams, and this week, a leak of major proportions: images of the outlandish and weird things planned for the "Super Power Building" that is slated to become Scientology's "Mecca" this year.
There's been so much "entheta" that is sure to "enturbulate" Scientologists (translation: negative press that is going to mess with their minds), we figured it was time to reverse the tide. And so, today, we're going to give Scientology a pure win, an upstat it is dearly in need of. Ladies and gentlemen, meet Michael Doven, perhaps the church's greatest living student of L. Ron Hubbard's technology!